


Paris: The City of Love

by orphan_account



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 21,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26740309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: After going to college abroad in Paris, Lexa returns to her hometown to teach at her old high school. Coming home means facing the people from her past. Things have changed drastically, but the people are just like she remembered them. Her main goal is to find out the truth about what happened all those years ago, but she also needs to buy some furniture.
Relationships: Abby Griffin/Jake Griffin, Bellamy Blake/John Murphy, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Monty Green/Harper McIntyre, Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Comments: 35
Kudos: 127





	1. Back in Time

Six years. It had been six years since she stood at the gate of this high school. Six years since she left everything she’d ever known to move halfway across the world and follow her dreams. Six years since she’d seen her friends and family, and the town that raised her.

She watched the kids milling on the steps of the school for a few minutes before making her way inside the building. She arrived at the empty classroom that had her name on the door and flipped on the lights. The whiteboard was large and daunting at the front of the classroom. She sighed and crossed the threshold into her new classroom and set her bag down on her desk.

The bell rang while she was tidying up her desk, causing her to jump and spill her pens on the floor. She quickly picked them up before making her way to the door to open it. The students arrived seconds later and filed into the classroom, mostly returning her greetings. All of them went straight to their seats, except for one.

The young girl had her blonde hair pulled back into a braid. Her dark brown eyes stared curiously up at her new teacher.

“Lex?”

The new teacher’s head jerked quickly to the girl, her green eyes widening comically. 

“Charlotte?”

“Yeah.” The girl took a tentative step closer, “You’re back? Like for good?”

The teacher nodded, “Yeah. I am.”

“Good. I’m glad.” Charlotte smiled at her teacher before turning away and making her way to her seat. She sat down with her friends who instantly began asking how she already knew the teacher.

“Alright. Thank you all for being on time. You can call me Ms. Alexandria. I’ll be your teacher for English this year. I expect you all to work your hardest, but if you’re having any problems completing the work please talk to me.” Her eyes swept over the bored forms of her students and she nodded to herself. “Right, since it’s the first day of school, how does a movie day sound? I have some more work to do before I can start teaching lessons.”

At the mention of a movie day, the students perked up. She smiled to herself as she stuck a bag of popcorn in the school provided microwave and turned off the lights. She opened up her computer and asked for suggestions.  _ Monty Python and the Holy Grail _ won in an almost unanimous vote and she turned on the movie.

About fifteen minutes in, each student had gotten firsts and seconds of popcorn and was happily munching while the movie played. Their teacher, however, was busy organizing her desk and writing lesson plans for the year. It was a little difficult to do in the dark, but she didn’t want to make the students watch the movie with the lights on.

When it ended, she turned the lights back on and turned off the projector. She told the students they could go on their phones or do any homework for other classes that they had. One student asked if they could play hangman and she tossed them the whiteboard marker with approval.

“Try to keep it at least somewhat appropriate.” Was all she said to them before returning to the lesson plans. When the bell rang to signal the end of class, she jumped again but none of the students noticed, and nothing was thrown or dropped. She ran her hand through her hair in exasperation before standing up and wiping off the board while saying goodbye to her students who happily waved back.

She cleaned up her classroom and wiped down the desks. She was surprised that there were no popcorn pieces crunched into her carpet, and the desks were barely buttery. Because she was humming while she cleaned, she didn’t hear the door open or notice the man standing in her classroom until he cleared his throat.

She didn’t jump, but she turned around incredibly quickly. It took her a moment to realize who was standing in front of her, but when she did she smiled.

“John!” She dumped the trash in the trash can before meeting him halfway and throwing her arms around him.

“When were you gonna tell me you were in town?” His tone wasn’t hostile, but it wasn’t incredibly warm either.

She pulled away from him, and tilted her head. “I was going to text you after I finished getting settled to see if you wanted to get dinner. But I’m guessing Charlotte beat me to it.”

He nodded and shrugged, “Everyone’s going to the bar tonight, if you want to come. I know it’s a school night but join us. You don’t have to drink.”

Lexa sighed, “Alright. But if it’s  _ everyone _ I think I might need at least a drink or two.”

Murphy laughed and clapped her on the shoulder, “Need any help getting settled? I don’t work today so this gorgeous body is all yours.”

“Get over yourself and help me move these desks. I have like sixteen students and twice as many seats.”

In a couple hours they had moved all the desks she didn't need for the students up next to the walls. They set the boxes of books that she was provided with on the desks as well as paper, pens, pencils, and other school supplies. Now that it looked more like a functional classroom, Lexa grabbed her bag and headed to her new house with Murphy.

“Woah, this is nice! When can I move in?”

Lexa just pushed him into the bushes as an answer and unlocked her front door. “As soon as I get furniture.”

Murphy peeked into the house through the open door and shook his head. “It’s empty.”

She nodded and led him into the kitchen that at least had a table and  _ six _ chairs. Murphy plopped down in one of the seats while Lexa got water for them.

“Do you at least have a bed?”

She set a glass of water in front of him before sitting across from him. “The house came with one, but the mattress feels like it’s 20 years old so I need to get a new one.”

He nodded and took a sip of his water. “Better sooner than later. That’ll kill your back and age you 50 years in a couple nights.”

“You would know.” A smirk played at the corner of her lips as Murphy stuck his tongue out at her.

“I don’t know why I thought a college in a foreign country would be able to cure your unbearable personality.”

Lexa laughed and leaned back in her seat. “Who would want to cure me?”

“Literally everyone. Did you not hear me? You’re  _ unbearable _ .” She knew Murphy didn’t mean it, he was smiling far too much.

“You love me.”

“For some reason.” He grumbled. Before Lexa can reply, his phone rang and he answered it.

“Hey Bell.” Silence.

“Yeah, I can be there in twenty minutes.” Silence.

“Alright. See ya then.” He hung up before looking at Lexa, “Sorry Lexie, duty calls. Good luck with the furniture.” He hugged her and headed out the door.


	2. One Too Many

After Murphy left, Lexa wandered around her house. To her, it didn’t feel empty per se. It felt open and breathable. It was freeing to be able to move around the rooms and not be afraid to tip over a one-thousand-year-old vase that had been passed down from her Nana.

She stopped by each room and tried to imagine how it would look once there was furniture in it. Ultimately, she decided it would be best to purchase the least amount of furniture possible for each room.

When she reached her bedroom, she took her time in the doorway. She noted that her open suitcase was still in the middle of the floor, and her bed was a disaster. She pursed her lips at the empty nightstand and ran her fingers through her hair when she saw the clothes that she had attempted to hang up in the closet thing morning pooling below the hangers.

Lexa reluctantly walked over to her suitcase. She crouched down next to it and pulled out a picture frame from beneath her clothes. She ran her fingers gently over the picture and closed her eyes for a moment. She stood up and set the frame down on the nightstand. It felt more like home already.

She sat down on her bed and stared at the picture. It didn’t take long for the tears to begin making their way down her cheek. She reached up instinctively and wiped them away as quickly as they had come. She sucked in a deep breath and held it for as long as she could before releasing it slowly.

This time when she looked at the picture, no tears came, only wonderful memories.

* _Four Years Ago_ *

“Hey! Wait up!”

The voice startled Lexa, but she pressed the button to hold the elevator and watched as a dark, curly-haired woman rushed towards her with a stack of binders in her arms. Most of the paper that was probably supposed to be inside of the binders were practically falling out. Lexa was amazed that the woman didn’t lose any of them.

It was easy to tell that she was late for something, but as she entered the elevator and the doors closed, she seemed to calm down.

“What floor?” Lexa asked as the elevator began to ascend.

“Uh,” she looked down at her binders for a moment, as if they would tell her, before looking back up at Lexa with a sheepish smile, “I don’t know.”

“You’re new.”

The woman shifted the binders in her arms, “Yep.”

“I’m Alexandria.” Lexa didn’t offer her hand. She knew that the woman would probably end up dropping everything if she tried to free up one of her own.

“Costia.”

Lexa smiled, “You’re Indra’s new secretary.”

Costia nodded frantically, “Do you know where her office is?”

Lexa pointed to the top floor, which was already lit up. “Her office is on the same floor as me. I’ll walk you to her office.”

The woman sighed in relief and sagged against the wall of the elevator. The two of them watched the numbers increase as they slowly climbed up the building.

Eventually, Costia broke the silence. “How long have you worked here?”

Lexa was staring directly ahead of herself at the doors, her hands clasped tightly behind her. Her back was straight and her feet were parted slightly. Costia would have mistaken her for a security guard if she hadn’t been wearing a light grey pencil skirt and baby blue blouse.

“I’ve been here for two years now.”

Costia couldn’t help but gasp, which caused Lexa to turn and look at her with worry etched into her features.

“Sorry! I just—You’re so young!”

Lexa felt another smile beginning to creep onto her face, so she turned back towards the doors. “The business world is a strange place.”

The doors opened and Lexa motioned for Costia to exit first. The woman did so, but cast a glance over her shoulder as she stepped out of the elevator.

“It certainly is.”

Lexa chuckled and led the new secretary down the hall and through the door that had Indra’s name on it. They entered the large office, without knocking, much to Costia’s terror. The woman inside stood up from her desk as they walked in.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you today, Alexandria,” she then noticed that there was someone behind Lexa, “You must be Costia. Your desk is just outside the door. Why don’t you set your stuff down and then we can talk?”

“Of course, ma’am. I’ll be right back.”

Lexa let the door close as Costia began depositing her stuff at her desk. She walked to the large window and looked out over the beautiful city. The sun had just finished rising and was casting a warm glow on the buildings.

“This office will be yours one day.”

Lexa shook her head and sucked in a deep breath, “I don’t deserve it.”

Indra smiled, coming to stand beside the brunette. “Then make sure that you do when the time comes for it to be yours. You’re young, but you’re brilliant and the company already respects you. When it is your time, the transition will be flawless.”

Lexa nodded gratefully to the woman as Costia entered the office once more. Indra turned around and greeted her new secretary.

“I’ll leave you two to it.” Lexa dipped her head to the women and exited the office.

*

That evening, after the workday was over, Lexa gathered up her belongings and made her way over to Costia’s desk. The woman looked frazzled and exhausted, surrounded by open binders and papers.

“How was your first day of work?” Lexa asked, leaning against the wall a couple feet away.

“Stressful.” The word was more of a groan, and Costia’s head dropped to the desk with a dull thud.

Lexa chuckled. “Come on, put everything in a drawer. I’m taking you out to dinner.”

Costia tilted her head, which was still on the desk, so she could look at the brunette.

“I’m serious. Shove it in a drawer.”

Costia opened the biggest drawer in her desk and dropped in all the binders and papers, grimacing as Lexa kicked it shut. The curly-haired woman had barely stood up from her chair when Lexa was shoving her purse and coat into her hands.

“I’m hungry, let’s go.”

Costia chuckled as Lexa took off at a brisk pace towards the elevators. When she arrived at the elevators, the brunette was repeatedly pressing the button to call the elevator.

“You must know that doesn't make the elevator come any quicker.”

“It does, if I _think_ it does.” Lexa smiled cheekily at Costia who just rolled her eyes.

The elevators finally arrived and they got in, beginning their descent. They were silent for the first few floors, each thinking through their own thoughts.

“Where are we going?” Costia asked suddenly.

“Dinner.”

Costia rolled her eyes, “ _Where_?”

“There’s this really good restaurant that I made reservations at. It’s like ten minutes away from here.”

Costia nodded, contemplating, “You made reservations before you knew if I could come?”

Lexa turned to look at her with a raised eyebrow. “No one turns down free food.”

Costia laughed softly to herself. It was a good point.

* _Present Day_ *

_Ring!_

Lexa shook her head to clear her mind of the memories. She didn’t remember a phone ringing in the elevator.

_Ring!_

She looked towards the end of the bed, where her phone was ringing. It took her a moment to actually process it, but the ringing had stopped before she had a chance to answer.

She stared at it. Her mind was still hazy from the memories, but when it started ringing again she reached across the bed and picked it up. She swiped her finger across the screen and brought it up to her ear.

“Hello?”

“ _Are you coming tonight or not?_ ” Murphy’s irritated voice replied.

“Shit. Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute.” She sprang off her bed and rushed into the bathroom to fix her makeup. After six years, she needed to at least look presentable.

“ _You better be_.”

_Click_.

She sighed and checked the time on her phone before putting it in her pocket. She was supposed to be at the bar twenty minutes ago.

She did her best to clean off the mascara that had been displaced earlier before applying more. She grabbed her keys and rushed out of the door, barely managing to lock up her house. For once, she was happy that she was in a small town. There was practically no traffic, and nearly every light was green.


	3. Rainy Day

Lexa showed up at the bar in her work clothes—dark blue slacks paired with an off-white button-up. On any other day, she knew Murphy would make fun of her for it, but since it was her first time seeing everyone again, the tensions would already be high.

And she was right. The tensions were extremely high. As soon as she walked through the door, she could feel dozens of eyes on her. It was worse than the stares she got when she was younger and so much worse than the stares she got when she walked the streets in Paris.

What she did not expect were the glares from Raven and Octavia. They were flanking Clarke and looked as if they were about to murder Lexa if she came any closer. So she didn’t. Instead, she stopped a couple of feet away from the table and tried to smile.

Luckily, Bellamy and Murphy arrived beside her with huge cheesy grins on their faces.

“First round is on Lex!” Murphy called out, passing out shots around the table.

A chorus of cheers erupted from the table—mainly Finn and Jasper—and Lexa shook her head as she accepted the glass from Murphy. She downed it quickly before grabbing a beer from the tray Bellamy had set on the table.

“It’s nice to see you again, Bell.” She smiled as he wrapped her up in the biggest bear hug she’d ever gotten.

“We missed you, a lot. It’s so good to have you back.” He pulled away suddenly, something akin to fear in his eyes, “You  _ are _ back for good, right?”

“If you’ll have me.” Bellamy nodded, satisfied with her answer, and retreated after Murphy to the counter in order to turn up the music.

Echo smiled up at Lexa and offered up the seat next to her. Lexa gratefully accepted and plopped down next to her.

“What brings you back from the big city?” Echo had always been straight to the point and Lexa isn’t sure why she’s surprised that she hasn’t changed one bit.

“I got offered a job at the high school during the summer. I would have come back earlier but it took a while to get everything wrapped up in Europe.”

Echo raised her eyebrows, “And?”

Lexa chuckled dryly at her prodding. “I guess I just missed the small town. I missed the people too. I thought maybe if I came back everything would be exactly the same as it used to be. But I left, and I was stupid to think it would be the same.”

“A lot of people left.” Echo sighed, “Murphy, Octavia, and Miller went to the East Coast with Bellamy. Monty, Harper, and Raven went to Florida for some science programs. Jackson and Wells went to Harvard. Clarke and I went to college locally with Jasper and Finn until they dropped out in the middle of the first semester.”

When Lexa tried to cut in, she held up a finger. “We weren’t together the whole time. We saw each other for the first summer, but then we were mostly separated for the next three years. We barely stayed in touch, and Jackson, Wells, Octavia, Monty, and Raven  _ just _ got back a couple of months ago. Yeah, you’ve been gone the longest and you’re the last one back, but just give them a chance. They all missed you.”

Lexa nodded and took a large swig from her beer bottle. “Any idea why Octavia and Raven look like they’re gonna throw me in a wood chipper as soon as they get the chance?”

Echo smiled sadly and squeezed her shoulder. “Be gentle with her okay? It’s been a rough six years.”

Lexa tilted her head, confused, but Echo got up before she could ask any more questions. It didn’t even take more than half a second for Raven to slide into the seat next to Lexa.

“Give me one good reason not to bash your head in.” The dark-haired girl didn’t even look at Lexa as she spoke, and her voice was dripping with venom.

“Jail?” Was all Lexa managed to choke out, and luckily for her, it was enough.

“I’ll give you that.” Raven turned to look at her finally, her eyes narrowed. “Why the fuck are you back?”

Lexa’s eyes widened and she instinctively leaned away from the girl, “I got a job offer and I thought it would be nice to be with everyone again.”

Raven studied her for a long while, but her eyes softened when she saw the terrified expression on the brunette’s face. “You didn’t know.”

Lexa tilted her head again. “No?”

“You didn’t get the fucking note. Oh my god.” Raven stood up insanely fast and stormed over to Clarke, pulling her and Octavia into the bathroom.

Lexa watched them in confusion, knowing that she shouldn’t go after them, but dying to know what was going on. Instead of answers, she found that her beer bottle was empty. She sighed and made her way to the counter, where Bellamy stood smiling. He handed her another beer without even asking.

“Do  _ you _ know what’s going on?” She asked him, hoping to get answers from someone.

He shook his head, turning back to whatever he had been doing before she arrived. “It’s not my story to tell, but they’re coming back now. I’ll give you some privacy.”

Bellamy left the counter, and Lexa turned around to see Octavia and Raven storming towards her. Her eyes widen and she tries to morph into the counter and escape, but unfortunately for her, she can’t do that.

“She’s in the bathroom.” Octavia smiled sadly and walked back to the table.

Lexa looked helplessly to Raven, who just pointed to the door of the bathroom.

“You should be in there too.” And with that, Raven also returned to the table, leaving Lexa to stumble confusedly into the bathroom.

She found Clarke curled up into a ball against the wall. The blonde was shaking and gasping for air.

Lexa fell to the floor beside her and pulled her into her arms.

“Hey, you’re okay. I’m here. You’re okay.”

Lexa whispered quiet words into Clarke’s hair for what seemed like an eternity before she calmed down enough to speak.

“I thought—I thought you were running away.” Were the first words Clarke said to Lexa after six years apart.


	4. Starlit Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little longer than the others. I might make some edits to clean it up later this week, but with finals and all that I didn't have as much time to edit as I had hoped but I still wanted to get this out today. Thanks for reading!

“I thought—I thought you were running away.”

Lexa stayed silent, waiting for her to continue. She was afraid that if she tried to cut in, the blonde would stop speaking.

“I left a note on your doorstep. I think I hoped that it would blow away and you wouldn’t see it, but it never crossed my mind that it would take you away from me.”

Clarke let out a shaky breath and pulled away from Lexa’s embrace so they could look into each other’s eyes.

“I needed my best friend but I was scared to tell anyone, cause once I did it would become real.” She wiped away a couple of her tears and looked to the floor, “I got pregnant.”

The brunette’s eyes widened. It was starting to make sense now.

“I didn’t see the note. I didn’t know.” Lexa tried to reach out for Clarke, but the blonde leaned away from her touch. She dropped her hands into her lap and stared helplessly at them.

“If I had known I would have stayed. I’m so sorry Clarke.”

Clarke sniffled, an acknowledgment of Lexa’s words, but she still seemed unsure of what to do.

“I’m here now. For good. I’m here.” Lexa spoke softly, reaching out for the blonde once more. This time, Clarke allowed herself to be pulled to the brunette's chest and they held each other tightly.

“Did you keep the baby?”

Clarke nodded, breathing in Lexa’s perfume, “She’s beautiful.”

Lexa smiled softly, “And the father?”

The blonde shook her head. Lexa nodded, knowing that if she didn’t want to talk about it, it wasn’t her place to pry.

They stayed there for a few more minutes, soaking in everything that had happened. When they finally pulled apart, Clarke looked up at Lexa sheepishly.

“I got mascara all over your shirt.”

Lexa chuckled, a smile growing on her face. “I’ll cherish it forever.”

Clarke managed to giggle at the brunette’s words before standing up. She offered a hand to Lexa, who accepted it. Once they were both standing, they went to the sinks and washed their faces.

After she had finished washing her face, Lexa leaned against one of the stalls and watched as Clarke reapplied her makeup. When she was about halfway through reapplying her mascara, she sighed.

“What happened to the note?”

“I’m not sure,” Lexa narrowed her eyes for a moment, trying to think back to that day and see if she remembered anything, “I’m thinking the wind must have blown it away. There’s not really another explanation.”

Clarke nodded and was silent for a moment.

“Even if you had known, you should have still gone to Paris.”

Lexa shook her head at the blonde’s words. “No way.”

“Yes, way. Lexa, it was your dream to go to Paris. I wouldn’t have wanted to stand in the middle of that.”

The brunette pushed herself off the stall and walked up behind Clarke so they could see each other clearly in the mirror. She opened her mouth, closed it, then sighed heavily before meeting the cerulean blue eyes.

“I don’t even know if I would have had a choice to stay or not. Sooner or later, I would have been whisked away to Paris. I just wish I could've been there for you at the beginning.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes at Lexa’s words but didn’t get a chance to answer because Finn stormed into the bathroom.

They quickly left the restrooms, knowing Finn was too drunk to care that he was in the ladies’ room, and made their way back to the table.

Lexa made her rounds, making sure to say hi to everyone. They all welcomed her back and asked her about Paris. The brunette answered all of their questions as honestly as she could and with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.

No one mentioned the mascara on her shirt, but they all seemed to notice that Raven and Octavia were no longer glaring at her. Octavia actually hung around her for most of the night, talking enthusiastically about some man from Paris that she would see every once in a while.

Clarke never strayed too far from the tall brunette. She subconsciously made sure that they could see each other at all times. They would occasionally make eye contact and hold it for a moment, asking silent questions and giving silent answers.

At one point, Bellamy came up next to Lexa and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. They stood there for a moment, just soaking in the scene of everyone together again.

“It’s amazing isn’t it?”

Lexa looked up at Bellamy with a raised eyebrow, “What is?”

“That after six years and a bathroom floor crying session, we’re all almost back to normal.”

Lexa let out a dry laugh, “I’m sure it's just the alcohol. They’ll have a lot of questions in the next few months that I’m not sure I can even answer. They don’t fully trust me again yet.”

Bellamy nodded, contemplating her words, “For Clarke’s sake, they’ll play nice though.”

Lexa smiled softly as he took his leave and went back to working the counter. She found herself walking over to Clarke, who yawned as soon as Lexa reached her.

"Hey." 

“Hey. Could you take me home? I got a ride here with Raven but I’m pretty sure she’s hammered out of her mind by now.”

They both looked over at the woman in question, who was currently trying to karate chop the table in half.

“Raven could build a working spaceship while hammered,” Lexa chuckled as she checked her watch, “But yeah, I can take you home.”

“Thank you.” Clarke yawned again.

Lexa shook her head, a fond smile on her lips, “Anytime.”

They said their goodbyes, grabbed their purses and headed out of the bar. Lexa held the passenger door open for Clarke before climbing in on the driver's side. “Music requests?”

“Whatever you want to play is fine, as long as it's on a low volume.”

Lexa nodded and turned the radio on the lowest volume. She put the car in drive before realizing she didn’t have an address. She turned to ask Clarke, but the blonde was already sound asleep. The brunette smiled and decided to drive to the Griffin household, with the hope that someone was at home.

When she pulled into the driveway, there were lights on inside the house. That was a good sign. Hopefully the older Griffins had Clarke’s daughter and an extra bedroom for the sleeping blonde.

The brunette took a deep breath before walking up to the front door and knocking. She heard voices on the other side of the door before it opened to reveal a tall figure. The man’s eyes grew wide as he stared at her.

“Jake? Who’s at the d—” Mrs. Griffin grew quiet as she rounded the corner and saw Lexa on their porch.

“Oh my god.” Jake reached out and poked the girl’s cheek and gasped when he felt real flesh. “You’re here.”

Lexa smiled softly at the man who had been like a second father to her for so many years.

“Clarke’s asleep in the car, I'm going to go get her.”

Jake glanced back at his wife briefly and noticed the paleness of her face, “I’ll come with you.”

When they reached the car, Clarke was beginning to stir. Lexa opened her door and unbuckled her seatbelt.

“Do you want to walk in or do you want me to carry you?”

Clarke laughed and swatted Lexa’s hands away. “I can walk.”

Lexa nodded and backed away from the door, but held out her hand to help Clarke down. The blonde smiled gratefully as she stepped out of the car.

“Hey, sweetheart.” Jake spoke up from behind them, and Clarke peered over Lexa’s shoulder to see him.

“Hey, Dad.” She hugged him tightly and they began walking towards the house.

Lexa remained by the car, unsure of what to do, but when Jake invited her inside, she closed the car door and followed them in.

Mrs. Griffin was more prepared the second time she saw Lexa and managed to say hello when they all arrived in the kitchen.

They all sat down at the table and a tense silence quickly settled over them. Abby had gotten each of them a glass of water and they all sipped slowly.

Clarke coughed, and all eyes turned to her. “She didn’t see the note.”

Jake and Abby set down their water glasses and stared at their daughter.

“So you weren’t running away?” Jake asked her quietly.

Lexa shook her head. “If I had known, there is no way I would have left.”

Jake nodded, but Abby looked appalled. “But you did. You ran away from all of your friends! People who supported you and loved you!”

“If pursuing my dreams is running away then I will admit to it, but I didn’t leave because of anything to do with them. I left because I got an offer to go to a college abroad in Paris.”

“So Clarke’s problems wouldn’t have mattered to you anyways. It was  _ Paris _ , why would you let her stop you?”

Lexa stood up so quickly that her chair went skidding backward on the tile. “Her  _ child _ is not a  _ problem _ . If I could go back in time, I would have made sure I said goodbye to her in person, made sure she told me, but I  _ can’t _ . It kills me to know that I missed out on six of the biggest years in my best friend’s life.

“I missed out on the first baby in my high school friend group. I tried to stay in contact with everyone, but because of the misunderstanding, no one would respond to me. I should have seen the signs earlier but I didn’t. I thought it was because of the time zones. Not  _ once _ did I even imagine that there was a new life that I was missing out on.”

Lexa blinked rapidly and ran her hand through her hair. “I’m sorry. I should go.”

Clarke stood up and followed as Lexa quickly made her out the door, leaving Mr. and Mrs. Griffin alone at the kitchen table.

“Lex!” Clarke reached out and grabbed her wrist.

Lexa turned around and there were tears in her eyes.

“Oh, Lex.” Clarke pulled the tall brunette into her arms and hugged her tight. “I’m so sorry Lex. I should have responded to all your messages.”

Lexa shook her head against Clarke’s shoulder and clung to her. “No, I should have never left.”

“You couldn’t have known. But I knew there was a possibility that you wouldn’t see the note.”

Lexa pulled away and wiped her eyes, watching Clarke carefully. “Do you think we’ll get through this?”

“I don’t know if we’ll come out on the other side without scars to show for it, but we’ll make it. We always do.”

Lexa smiled, studying the woman in front of her before looking up into the night sky.

“Paris has nothing on the sights in this town.”

Clarke looked up into the sky as well and smiled, “It’s beautiful isn’t it?”

“Gorgeous.”

Clarke looked back down to see Lexa’s eyes on her. She swatted at her best friend and shooed her into the car.

“You have to teach school tomorrow, I should let you go.”

Lexa pouted but buckled her seatbelt nonetheless. Clarke rolled her eyes and waved goodbye to her best friend. “Reshop, Lexa.”

“Reshop, Clarke.”

The blonde turned and walked back to the porch, but watched until Lexa’s car disappeared down the road. With memories of her childhood playing on repeat, she entered her parents' home.


	5. Black & Blue

When Lexa woke up, she was alone in a dark room. Her furniture was gently illuminated by the cool light of the moon that shone through her open window. She sat upright in her bed and took a deep breath. She glanced at the clock beside her bed.

_ 5:20 _ . She ran her fingers through her hair, attempting to untangle it. Yesterday felt like a dream or maybe a nightmare—she wasn’t quite sure—and the only thing that confirmed the reality of it all was hanging on the back of her desk chair.

Lexa extracted herself from her sheets and stood up. Once her eyes had adjusted to the low light, she made her way to the chair. She reached out to hesitantly trace her fingers of the mascara stains on her shirt. A breath she didn’t know she was holding escaped her lungs.

Now that she had confirmed yesterday’s events, she changed into her running clothes and went out for a jog. Running cleared her head and allowed her to think properly. She enjoyed the activity as often as she could.

As she ran, she noted everything that her home had that Paris hadn’t been able to give her. She had missed the breeze that rolled off the ocean and the seagulls that dutifully flew overhead. She had missed the tall palm trees whose fronds would sway in the early morning. She had missed her home.

Despite not having a predetermined destination in mind, she wound up in the last spot she had seen Clarke before Paris.

The entrance to the pier was daunting. Nevertheless, she made her way down to the end of it. With the ocean’s waves crashing violently against the rocks and the sturdy feeling of wood beneath her feet, she fell to her knees and began to weep.

She wept for the life she could have lived, the life she did live, and the lives that the people around her had lived. She wept for the beginning of the young life that she had missed. She wept for everything she had lost but all she had gained at its expense.

Lexa knew her old mentor would berate her if he saw her in this state. But she couldn’t help but smirk at how he was wrong.

*  _ Five Years Ago _ *

“You tried to reach out to them again today.”

Lexa turned to look at him. The tall man stood in the doorway. He looked furious with her, but she didn’t break eye contact.

“It has been a year, Alexandria. You  _ must _ forget about them.”

The brunette narrowed her eyes and took a step towards her mentor, “I will not forget about them. Not now and not ever.”

“They have forgotten about you and yet you let them distract you from what is really important.”

“Right now,  _ you _ are distracting me.”

“I-”

“Titus. I’m finished speaking with you. Get out.”

“You will  _ not _ ignore my teachings. They are getting in the way of your success and the company’s success. Please consider the company. It is your responsibility.”

“It is not my responsibility yet and I am still the most successful student you’ve had in a long time Titus. Unless you’ve been lying to me.”

He bit back a retort and dipped his head to her slightly, “I have not lied to you.”

“Good. Now go. I have work to do.”

Titus exited the room and made sure to close the door.

Lexa breathed in a sigh of relief and sat down at her desk. She heard the door that joined her and Anya’s room open. She waited for the older girl to speak. When she didn’t, the brunette opened her eyes and saw the blonde watching her carefully.

“He’s right you know.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow at her.

Anya chuckled and shook her head, “They haven’t answered you for a year, squirt. Maybe it is time to let it go.”

“I still have hope.” The words were whispered, and desperate. The blonde smiled sadly and enveloped her into a tight hug.

“Then I’ll have hope with you.”

*  _ Present Day  _ *

They never forgot about her. They remember her with animosity, but they still remembered her. Her hope had paid off. She had found her family again. Sure, it was still a little broken, but it was her’s.

She dried off her cheeks and dusted off her pants. During her jog back to her house, she recalled countless memories that she had with Titus and Anya at the company. Anya taught her more than Titus ever could have, but she wouldn’t be where she was today if it wasn’t for him.

She took a quick shower and collected all of her school supplies before heading to the campus. The traffic wasn’t too bad and she managed to get into her classroom with 20 minutes to spare before the first bell would ring.

Lexa wrote the week’s agenda on the board and put a book and a packet on each of her students’ desks. She straightened up her own desk then made her way to the door. As she pulled it open, the bell rang. She was surprised to find that Charlotte was already standing on the other side.

“Hi, Ms. Alexandria.” She sounded surprised, as if she had also expected yesterday to be a dream.

Lexa smiled softly at her, “Hey Charlotte.”

“I’m glad you’re really back.”

“Me too.”

Charlotte smiled widely and hugged Lexa before making her way to her desk. The other students quickly followed, having arrived just as the blonde crossed through the doorway.

Lexa made sure to greet each student as they entered. Once the last student sat down at his desk, she closed the door and went to the board.

“I have written an agenda for the week on the board, so if you would like to write it down somewhere, you may. I have also placed a book and a packet on each of your desks. This is your homework for the next two weeks. Read the book, and fill out the packet. When you are finished, turn it in to me. It is due before the end of school next Friday for credit.”

Several of her students began flipping through the packet so Lexa cleared her throat. All eyes snapped back up to her and she straightened her back. She grasped her hands together behind her back.

“The packet is  _ home _ work. We will be having discussions on speeches we will be listening to in class this week and next week we will be doing some on-demand essays.”

The students groaned and Lexa took a measured step forward, “I expect all of my students to try their best and to participate.”

A couple of them mumbled agreements, which was enough to satisfy her, so she relaxed her posture, “We aren’t doing a discussion today, but I did invite a couple of guest speakers. Please give them your full attention. You do not need to take notes, but I expect you to pay attention and not goof off.”

As soon as she was finished speaking, the door opened and two people entered the classroom. They were both dressed exquisitely in their crisp grey suits, though the man was wearing flip flops in the spirit of the coast.

They each had red, white, and blue ties with the pattern of the French Flag, and golden tie clips. The man’s suit hugged the toned muscles of his arms and legs. In any other circumstances, he would have been an imposing figure, but the smile that he cast towards Lexa was genuinely childish.

The woman was only a couple of inches shorter than the man, but much more slim. Her suit was well-fitted to her body and her hair was in intricate braids. She dipped her head ever so slightly towards Lexa as she entered but otherwise kept her posture perfect.

“Lincoln, Anya, you’ve got the floor.” Lexa smiled at each of them in turn before sitting down at her desk.

They stood side by side and took turns speaking seamlessly about the history of French literary figureheads. Both of them were extremely knowledgeable and appeared not to tire of the subject. Many of the students were captivated by how well they transitioned between the topics and elegantly included fascinating facts.

When they finished, the students began asking them questions about France and eventually begged them to speak in French. Lincoln winked at the girl who had asked and began reciting French poetry. The students watched him in awe. He had a perfect accent and many of the students were swooning.

Eventually the bell rang and the students had to leave to go to their next class. Once the last student had left—she was taking a selfie with Lincoln—the three of them embraced.

“We missed you, Lexie.”

“I missed you both, too.”

Anya rolled her eyes and pulled away from the hug, “Obviously you missed us. Now, tell us.”

Lexa shrugged and leaned against her desk, “I went to the bar last night with everyone.”

“And?” Lincoln pressed.

“Clarke and I talked about things. She was pregnant when I left and she thought that I knew but didn’t want to be involved.”

Anya raised an eyebrow but Lexa just shrugged again.

“We straightened everything out. I’m pretty sure I offended her mom for all of eternity, but I think Clarke and I are friends again.”

Anya nodded and pulled Lexa off her desk, “Come on, we’re getting you some furniture. Lincoln doesn’t want to sleep on the floor and there’s no way I’m sharing a bed with either of you.”

Lexa chuckled and grabbed her things, “You paying?”

Anya stopped in the doorway and looked back at Lexa, “Ha. So funny.” She rolled her eyes and continued out the door with Lincoln and Lexa on her heels.


	6. Like a River

Lincoln and Anya were sitting comfortably on the newly purchased light grey couches that were on top of the newly purchased rug, so they could watch a show on the newly purchased TV. They each had their own bowl of hot, buttery popcorn in their laps. Anya was holding the control in her hand while she argued with Lincoln about what show to watch.

Anya was determined to watch at least one episode of The Walking Dead, since she didn’t want to get behind her watch schedule before the new season premiered. However, Lincoln was adamant that it was too dark to watch on a school night and they would be better off watching Spongebob.

“I swear Spongebob is stealing years of your life, and also your intelligence.”

Lincoln gasped, “Everything useful I’ve learned has been from Spongebob. It’s how I got so good at grilling burgers.”

Meanwhile, Lexa was in the kitchen waiting for her own popcorn to finish popping. As she was pulling it out of the microwave, her doorbell rang. She hurried over to the door and opened it with the steaming bag in her hand.

“John? Bellamy?”

“Hey, Lex!” Murphy smiled and hugged her tightly before stealing her bag of popcorn and scurrying into the kitchen. Lexa rolled her eyes and hugged Bellamy.

After she closed the door, they made their way into the kitchen as well. They arrived and found Anya, Lincoln, and Murphy in an awkward staring contest.

“You have guests?” Murphy asked, peering around them to see the furniture in the living room, “And  _ two _ couches?”

“John, these are our cousins Anya and Lincoln.”

Murphy stared at Lexa for a moment before he narrowed his eyes and pulled Bellamy into his side, “This is my boyfriend, Bellamy.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you both. Lexie has told us a lot about you.” Lincoln reached forward and shook both of their hands.

Anya shook hands with them as well, and even offered them a smile. It was more than Lexa was expecting since Anya was never big on new people.

“When-?” Lexa gestured uselessly at her brother and his boyfriend.

“A year and a half,” Bellamy chuckled and kissed the top of Murphy’s head before pushing him away, “The actual reason we came over was to let you know that a bunch of people are going to the fair on Friday. Thought you might want to join us.”

Lexa smiled, “Yeah. The school is going on a field trip there so I can just catch a ride over on the bus after class.”

“Cool,” Bellamy turned to Anya and Lincoln, “You two can come too.”

“Sure. We’ll go.” The blonde offered while Lincoln nodded enthusiastically.

“Great. Pretty much everyone is going to be there so you can meet the crew.”

Lincoln smiled, “Spongebob or The Walking Dead?”

Murphy looked over from where he had been eating Lexa’s popcorn, “Spongebob all the way.”

“Ha! Spongebob it is!”

Anya rolled her eyes, “There’s still two more people that have to vote.”

“Sorry, but I’m gonna have to go with Murphy on this one.” Bellamy at least had the decency to give her an apologetic look.

“Your friends are literal children.” Anya groaned.

Lexa chuckled, “Yep.”

Anya turned on Spongebob for the boys, who all sat in the living room. They each had a bowl of popcorn and happily watched the cartoon while Anya stayed in the kitchen to talk with Lexa.

*  _ Friday  _ *

As soon as the last bell rang, Lexa hastily made her way out of her classroom. She went straight to the bus where all the kids were but noticed that Anya and Lincoln were waiting in a car a couple of spaces away. She walked up to the car and knocked on the window.

Lincoln smiled at her as he lowered the window, “Get in, loser.”

She quickly got into the back seat, and when she was buckled in, Anya pulled out of the parking space. The drive didn’t take long, but Anya made sure to complain about Lincoln’s choice in music for the entire time.

“I can’t believe you listen to this crap. It’s going to make your ears bleed.”

“At least I don’t listen to music from the 1100s.”

Lincoln barely managed to dodge Anya’s hand as she tried to smack him. Lexa rolled her eyes as she watched their antics from the back seat. When she realized they weren’t going to stop arguing, she looked out the window. She couldn’t wait to be at the fairgrounds. It had been so many years since she had gone, and the fact that her entire high school friend group was going to be there as well made her ecstatic.

Lexa would be lying if she said she hadn’t spent at least an hour trying to decide what to wear today. It was difficult for her to find something that wouldn’t be too casual for school, but also not too formal for the fair. She had resigned to settling on black jeans, a grey button-up, and brown lace-up boots. It was way too casual for school—in her opinion—but she wasn’t keen on enjoying the fair in a suit.

Anya parked as close as she could to the entrance and they all scrambled out of the car.

Anya and Lincoln argued about something the whole way through the parking lot—Lexa didn’t pay them any mind so she wasn’t sure what the subject was this time.

Unfortunately, because the bus of high schoolers had just unloaded, there was quite a long line to get into the fair. Lexa got in line with Charlotte and they talked to each other as they entered the fair.

When they were barely through the entrance, a little girl sprinted up to Charlotte and the blonde twirled her around in her arms.

“Hey, Madi!”

The little girl wriggled free of the high schooler’s arms and smiled up at her, “Hi!”

Lexa felt her heart warm at the interaction, but she couldn’t help looking around. She was still a good distance from the tables. Before she could separate herself from the two, the little girl—Madi—looked at her.

“Who are you?’

Charlotte crouched down next to Madi, “That’s my teacher. Her name is Ms. Alexandria.”

Madi’s nose scrunched up, “That’s a super long name.”

Lexa chuckled and crouched down as well so she was at the little girl’s eye level, “I let my friends call me Lexa,” she turned to Charlotte, “Outside of school.”

Charlotte smiled widely at her.

“Leksa?”

The brunette turned back to Madi and smiled, “Hmm?”

The little girl reached her arms up towards Lexa, “Mama is gonna be scared. I wasn’t supposed to let go of her hand.”

Lexa picked her up. They both bid their goodbyes to Charlotte since the school chaperones were calling all the students over to talk about the rules.

“Where’s your Mama?” Lexa asked.

“The picnic tables.”

“I’m supposed to meet all of my friends over there. That’s very convenient.”

Madi nuzzled into Lexa’s shoulder, and wrapped her little arms tighter around her neck.

When they got to the picnic tables, Clarke ran over to them. She looked out of breath, but relieved.

“Where have you been, baby?”

Lexa almost responded, but her brain caught up with the situation before she could. She felt her face heat up and was sure she was bright red, so she tried to turn her head away so Clarke wouldn’t notice.

“I saw Charlotte so I went to go say ‘hi’ to her. I’m sorry Mama.”

“That’s okay, baby. Just make sure to let me know before running off next time, okay? You scared me.”

“Okay, Mama.”

They were silent for a moment before Madi squirmed to get more comfortable in Lexa’s arms.

“Have you met Leksa, Mama?”

Clarke smiled at the brunette who was peeking over Madi’s wild hair.

“Yeah, I have.”

They made small talk while they walked to the tables. Once Clarke and Madi were settled, Lexa walked over to where Anya and Lincoln were standing.

“Could you both help me get food for everyone?”

The siblings nodded and when the three of them returned with several trays of food, everyone thanked them profusely before digging in.

Lexa grabbed the food she had ordered for herself, Clarke, and Madi, before sitting down with them. She distributed the food—and a milkshake for Madi—which earned her two grins from both Griffin girls. She grinned back at them and they began eating.

Throughout lunch, Lexa could feel Raven and Octavia watching her. She wasn’t quite sure what the reason was for their staring, but she was sure it wasn’t malice this time. She did her best to ignore them and continued making conversation with the ecstatic six-year-old.

They discovered that they both had a love of whale sharks in common, and they both adored the ocean. They both loved going to the beach, playing at the park, and just being outdoors in general. Because of Clarke’s crazy work hours, Madi would usually spend her days with Mr. Griffin at the beach or the park next to their house.

“Clarke.”

The blonde looked over at Lexa with her burger halfway to her wide open mouth and raised an eyebrow.

“Madi has never ridden on a horse.”

Clarke stared at Lexa for a moment, “Okay?”

“Why not?”

Clarke set down her burger and turned so that she was facing the brunette more fully, “I’ve just never had time to get her out to a ranch.”

Lexa looked down at Madi who was staring at her with pleading eyes, “We’re going to a ranch tomorrow then.”

The blonde’s eyes widened, “Excuse me, what?”

“You don’t have work tomorrow, do you?”

“Well, no—”

“I can book a lesson and we can all go riding.”

“Lexa—”

“Please, Clarke?” The brunette pouted at her and Clarke rolled her eyes.

“You are worse than my kid.”

Lexa high fived Madi, “I’ll make sure you ride the prettiest horse they have.”

Madi smiled and snuggled into her side, “Thank you, Leksa.”

“Of course, Squirt.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I will be unable to post tomorrow, I decided to post this chapter early. After this week, I will resume posting every Wednesday.


	7. To The Ocean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my amazing friend who graciously offered to edit this chapter (and all future ones) for me!

Clarke watched the interaction between her daughter and her best friend with great interest. The conversation flowed easily between the two of them. At one point, she made eye contact with Octavia and Raven. Madi’s two god-aunt’s were just as attentive to them as she was.

The little girl had never been fond of new people, and it had taken months for her to speak more than two words to pretty much anyone in Clarke’s friend group. It had only taken a couple of weeks for her to warm up to Mr. and Mrs.Griffin though, which was a godsend to Clarke.

The blonde didn’t know if Madi would have grown up into such an amazing little girl without the elder Griffins’ help. Being a single parent and working a full-time job was difficult enough, but with the added stress of college, she just about drove herself off the edge.

Seeing the way that her daughter adjusted so easily to someone who had been in Paris for her entire life, warmed her heart. She was happy that the most important person in her life was so interested in her best friend.

They conversed as if they had known each other for forever, and shared so many interests that Clarke didn’t even bother trying to keep track, and once they’d finished their food, it was time to play fair games.

When the friend group began splitting up, Lexa opted to go with Madi, which meant that she would be staying with Clarke, Raven, Octavia, Lincoln, and Anya..

“Hey Lexa,” Clarke watched as Raven smiled at the brunette, “How do you like the little booger?”

Lexa opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by Octavia’s gasp, “She is  _ not _ a booger! She’s a beautiful little princess!”

From her spot on Lexa’s shoulders Madi yelled, “Boogers are cool!”

Lexa laughed loudly, pulling Clarke into a trance, and squatted down so Raven and Madi could high five. Octavia let out a groan and sped up so she could walk next to Lincoln.

It took awhile for them to get through the first few games, since everyone wanted to have a turn. Eventually, Octavia and Lincoln parted from the group. With two less people, the games went by a little faster. Raven and Anya had also stopped playing and just began commentating Lexa, Madi, and Clarke’s ability to successfully play the games.

On the way to one of the next stands, Lexa put her arm out in front of Clarke to point at where Lincoln and Octavia were standing extremely close together.

“What’s up with them?”

The blonde shrugged, and turned away to give them their privacy, “She’s been talking about some guy from Paris for a while, maybe it’s him.”

Lexa nodded thoughtfully, “I’m happy for them.”

Clarke smiled at her before they heard Madi call out for them.

“Let’s play this one!” The little girl was next to a game they hadn’t played yet, with Raven and Anya on either side of her. She was pointing ecstatically at a sea-green whale shark plushie that was easily 3 times her size.

“Good eye!” Lexa grabbed Clarke’s arm and pulled her over to the game.

The guy who was supposed to be running the game looked them over with a bored expression as they approached.

“You gotta pay if you wanna play.”

Lexa pulled out a wad of cash and handed some of it to him before picking up Madi and setting her on the stool.

The guy explained that in order to win the plushie, she had to knock down twelve targets with the ping-pong ball gun. On her first try, Madi held the trigger down for the entire time and rapidly fired. She managed to knock down eight of the targets—Lexa wasn’t even sure how—but it still wasn’t enough to win the plushie.

“Another turn?”

Lexa agreed and handed more money to the guy.

“You got this, Squirt.”

Madi did not ‘got this’ but she had fun trying to knock down the targets. When she realized that she wasn’t going to be able to win the plushie herself, she slid off the stool and attempted a wink at the brunette.

“It’s your turn, Leksa.”

Lexa winked back and handed the guy some more money. From watching Madi, she knew that there were 13 ping-pong balls loaded, so she would have one test shot. The first shot would be to test the gun’s accuracy.

As she suspected, it was extremely inaccurate. She had aimed for the target that was in the middle of the bottom row, but the ball had hit the top left target. Luckily, she had still managed to knock over the target.

Lexa smirked before aiming at another target. She shot each ball, one after the other, and knocked every target down on the first hit. The guy kept a bored expression on his face the entire time, but when each target was down and the game played a happy tune, he raised an eyebrow at Lexa.

“Nice. Army?”

The brunette shook her head, “I had overseas training.”

With one extra ping-pong ball that she had asked to keep as a souvenir, and a giant sea-green whale shark, they made their way over to a whack-a-mole game that Clarke played every time she came to the fair.

While Clarke was attempting to annihilate the moles, she heard Madi rambling to Lexa about the countless documentaries she had watched with Mr. Griffin. She talked about the first time she had seen a whale shark on the TV and how Clarke had cruelly told her they didn’t have enough room for one.

Lexa barely succeeded at stifling a chuckle and tried to back up Clarke’s point that they weren’t kept as pets in people’s backyards, and were usually kept in a big aquarium.

The conversation shifted to the llamas that they had seen last year at the fair. Madi’s favorite one had been the brown and white one because he would nuzzle her when she scratched behind his ear.

Around that time, Clarke had enough of the moles and let Lexa lead them to the petting zoo. Lexa also enjoyed petting the llamas, so Clarke stayed outside of the pen and took several pictures of her daughter and her high school bestfriend fawning over the furry creatures.

Unfortunately, the llama from last year wasn’t there. To make up for it, Lexa paid for a pony ride and Madi loved it.

Clarke stood by Lexa and they watched as the little girl rode around in a circle on top of the pony and smiled at them everytime she went by.

“Last year she wouldn’t stop asking me for a llama. She’s going to start asking for a pony now.”

“When’s her birthday?”

Clarke’s head snapped up in alarm, “There is no way I’m taking care of a pony. Do  _ not _ buy her one.”

Lexa chuckled, “I’d take care of it. I’ve already been thinking of expanding my yard so I would have space for one.”

“You are not buying her a pony.”

“Technically I would be buying  _ me _ a pony that she could borrow sometimes.”

“No.”

“‘No’, what?”

“You are not buying a pony.”

Lexa pouted for a couple moments before narrowing her eyes, “Wait a minute.”

Clarke raised her eyebrows and waited patiently for Lexa to continue.

“You can’t tell me that I can’t buy a pony.”

“Well I am.”

“ _ Fine _ . No pony.”

Clarke smiled sweetly at her as she groaned before going to collect her daughter, now that the pony ride was over.


	8. Admiring From Afar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my amazing friend for editing!

After countless fair games and even some cotton candy—it took some extra convincing from Lexa for Clarke to let them have it—they made their way to the ferris wheel. It was 6:30 on the dot when they arrived.

Everyone except for Monty, Harper, Jasper, and Finn were already in line. Lexa picked up Madi in one arm, and Clarke grabbed her free hand so they wouldn’t get separated as they made their way to where the majority of their group was.

Raven and Octavia grabbed Madi from Lexa so the three of them could go on the ride together, leaving Clarke and Lexa alone at the back of the group. They stood close to one another and talked softly.

“Last time we came here everyone was in high school,” Lexa paused, “Except for Bellamy, Echo, and Niylah.”

Clarke smiled up at Lexa, their faces merely inches apart, “Last time we were all here, I didn’t have a kid.”

The brunette’s eyes lit up, “Madi is literally the  _ cutest _ . Did you see her face when we got the plushie? She was ecstatic!”

Clarke watched in amusement as Lexa continued rambling about the blonde’s daughter.

“And did you see her when she got off the pony? She looked like all her dreams had come true. She made  _ me _ want to ride the pony.”

Lexa pouted at Clarke and the blonde laughed, “Yeah? I think you’re a little too big to ride a pony.”

“Just a little bit.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and bumped her shoulder with Lexa’s. She didn’t have time to say anything more, however, because the loud speaker came on and began giving them boarding instructions. Monty and his crew arrived just as Raven and Octavia were getting in their car with Madi.

Clarke and Lexa got a car to themselves and sat on the side facing the ocean. There wasn’t a ton of space so they were pressed close together, but the cool breeze made them appreciate eachother’s presence.

When they reached the top, and the ferris wheel slowed down, Clarke laid her head on Lexa’s shoulder. They watched the sunset together for the first time in six years; but nothing felt any different.

“Remember the last time we watched sunset from the ferris wheel?”

Lexa laid her head on top of Clarke’s, “Yeah. I do.”

“I knew then.”

Lexa responded with a sleepy, “Hmm?”

The blonde pulled her head away from Lexa’s shoulder and looked into her green eyes, “I knew I was pregnant then.”

Understanding flashed across Lexa’s face before her eyes flickered down to Clarke’s stomach. They stayed there for a moment before returning to wary blue eyes.

“You knew.” The brunette repeated and Clarke nodded.

Lexa continued to search Clarke’s eyes, her lips slightly parted, “How far along were you?”

“Ten or eleven weeks.”

Lexa nodded and pulled her eyes away from Clarke’s face and stared at the water. The golden flow of the sun was reflecting back at her, causing her to squint. She didn't turn back to the blonde beside her because she couldn’t think of anything else to say.

Clarke accepted that fact and rested her head on Lexa’s shoulder once more as they went around the ferris wheel a second time.

As they began to go around the third time, Lexa breathed in a deep breath, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Clarke nuzzled under her arm and snuggled into her side, “I thought you would have been mad at me.”

The brunette slipped her arm around Clarke’s waist and pulled her closer.

“I didn’t want to tell you because I thought I would lose you, but by not telling you, I did lose you.”

Lexa turned so that she could rest her chin on top of Clarke’s head. She stared at nothing in particular, the gears turning in her head.

Finally, she spoke. 

“I may have gotten lost for a little while, but we always find our way back to each other somehow. I’m not going anywhere anymore, not without you.”

On the fourth rotation, Clarke yawned, “Hey, Lex?”

“Hmm?”

“What happened in Paris?”

Lexa sighed, leaning her head backwards and staring up at the sky.

“I went to college, as was planned. During my first year, my Aunt and Uncle contacted me. They had me come work for them part-time while I finished school. Anya had a few years on me at the company, but Lincoln and I started at the same time.”

Clarke nodded to show that she was listening, but stayed silent. She had hoped that Lexa would continue speaking, but after a couple minutes of silence, she realized she was going to have to pry.

“Why did you come back?”

“I’m able to do my job remotely now, and I wanted to come back. I missed my home.”

“You still work for the company in addition to teaching?”

“More or less.”

Clarke let it slide. It was too difficult to get her to open up more about it.

*  _ 2 Years Ago _ *

Lexa stood straight with her chin slightly raised. Her posture conveyed a sense of calm, but she was a bundle of nerves when the figure rose from behind the desk and matched her height.

“Indra,” Lexa eyed the woman carefully, “You asked to see me?”

“Yes. It is time,” Indra stepped around the desk to where the brunette was standing, “It is time for you to take over the company.”

Lexa took a startled step back, “Excuse me?”

“You know that your father left it for you to run as soon as the council accepted you. They have been watching you training and your work with great interest. Now that you have finished your education and can assume a full-time position within the company, they are asking you to take over.”

Lexa shook her head, “If anyone should get the company, it’s John.”

“Your father chose you, Alexandria. You are the oldest afterall.”

“But John—”

Indra held up her hand to stop Lexa mid-sentence and sighed, “Your brother has been observed as well. He has been deemed by the council as ineligible to take over now or ever in the future.”

“What did he do?”

Indra shrugged, “I don’t get the details, only the final decisions.”

Lexa nodded and looked warily around the room, “What do we do now?”

Titus will become your full-time advisor for company matters. Anya and I will be able to continue with you training if you decide to do so.

Lexa nodded, everything still working itself out in her head.

Indra shook forearms with Lexa, “You're the boss now.” With those last four words, Indra left Lexa alone in her office. The use of her childhood language almost broke her, but she battled the tears and got to work.

*  _ Present Day _ *

The ferris wheel came to a stop and they all got off. When she and Clarke got to Madi, the little girl was yawning and rubbing her eyes.

“I’m tired Mama.”

Clarke smiled and picked her up, “Me too, baby.”

Lexa awkwardly cleared her throat to get the blonde’s attention, “If you both are okay with it, you could stay at my house. The ranch I reserved is a couple hours of a drive so we’ll have to leave early-ish.”

Clarke nodded, “Text me your address. I’ll be there in an hour.”

The blonde and her daughter said goodbye to everyone and left the fair. Anya informed Lexa that she was going to stay at Raven and Octavia’s with Lincoln, so they wouldn’t need the beds at her house.

“It was nice seeing you all today,” Lexa offered to her high school buddies. They all quickly returned the sentiment and bid her goodnight.

When she got back to her house, she changed the sheets on the beds and made sure that her house was even more spotless than it already was. Anya and Lincoln stopped by to collect their stuff about 10 minutes before Clarke showed up.

Madi was practically asleep when she parked so Lexa helped carry her inside. The brunette set her on one of the beds and tucked her in. Lexa left a gentle kiss on the little girl’s forehead and felt tiny arms wrap around her neck.

“Night, Leksa.”

“Goodnight, Squirt.”

She exited the room and gave Clarke and her daughter some privacy for whatever their bedtime routine was.

When Clarke emerged from the room, Lexa was in the kitchen with two glasses of red wine. Clarke smiled when she saw the glasses and slid onto a stool at the counter.

“I figured this would help us unwind from the busy day.”

“Thank you, Lex.”

The brunette smiled and took a sip of her own glass before leaning against the counter.

“How’d you make a perfect daughter?”

Clarke chuckled, “You haven’t seen her throw a tantrum yet.”

“No I have not.”

They remained in the kitchen for a long time, talking and enjoying each other’s company before heading to bed. They both pondered the day’s events as they tried to fall asleep.


	9. When Morning Light Sings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to my amazing friend for editing!

Lexa woke up to the sound of whimpering from the next room over. When she opened her eyes, it was pitch black. The clock beside her bed read 3:07 a.m.. She pulled herself out of her bed and entered the room where the whimpering was coming from.

She found Madi curled in on herself in the corner of the room, behind a chair. Her eyes were big and wide. The little girl had obviously had a nightmare, and it broke Lexa’s heart.

Instead of speaking, the brunette sat down with her back against the wall. In a few moments, Madi had crawled into her lap and was hugging her tightly. Lexa wrapped her arms around her and they sat there in silence until Madi had stopped whimpering.

When Lexa began to let go, Madi snuggled further into her grip.

“Can I sleep with you, Leksa?”

“Of course you can, Squirt.”

Lexa stood up with Madi still in her arms, and carried her back to her bedroom. They got under the covers and Madi sprawled out over Lexa.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Lexa asked quietly, not wanting to disturb the silence of the early morning. Madi didn’t reply for a long time, and Lexa assumed she had already fallen asleep, but she replied eventually.

“I had a nightmare and I got scared.” She said it so quietly and with so much shame that Lexa’s heart broke all over again.

“Hey, you know it’s okay to be scared, right?”

“You’re never scared.”

Lexa chuckled dryly, stroking her fingers absentmindedly through the little girl's hair.

“I get scared all the time.”

Madi pulled out of her grip and sat up, clearly wanting Lexa to explain more. The brunette sighed and sat up as well.

“When I left my home six years ago and flew across the ocean to Paris, I was terrified. I was so scared to leave the family that I had made here. Even though I was scared, I went to Paris. I found a family there that loved me and helped me grow into the person I am today.

“Then, a couple months ago when I was putting together the plans to come back here, I was so scared to see everyone again. I thought that no one would want to see me. But I came back to my home anyway. Doing the things that scare you can open doors that you never knew were there, or lead you to people that you never would have met.”

Lexa looked pointedly at Madi as she said the last part and the little girl broke out into a big smile.

The brunette smiled softly back at her before pulling Madi into lap and hugging her tightly.

“Just because I don’t show that I’m scared doesn’t mean I’m not. It’s okay to be scared. Anyone who says they never get scared is lying to you. What you do about your fears is what matters.”

Madi nodded against her chest, little arms wrapped around her neck.

“Can I still stay with you tonight?”

“Of course, Squirt.”

They crawled back under the covers and Madi re-sprawled herself on top of Lexa. Without thinking, Lexa craned her neck and kissed the top of Madi’s head.

“Goodnight, Squirt.”

“Night, Leksa.”

They both fell asleep quickly, and Madi didn’t have any more nightmares.

When they woke up again, it was 7 a.m.. Madi stretched on top of Lexa and the brunette wrapped her arms around the little girl.

“How’d you sleep?”

“Good.”

Madi smiled widely, sitting up on Lexa’s abdomen.

“I’m hungry.”

Lexa chuckled and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Madi’s hair was an absolute disaster, but she didn’t seem to care at all. Her pajama shirt had a bunch of pastel sea creatures printed on them, but her pants were bright red and had a bunch of little snowmen on them.

“Good morning cuddles?” Lexa asked, opening her arms and pouting when Madi hesitated.

Madi rolled her eyes in true Griffin fashion, before plopping herself back on top of Lexa and snuggling up to the older woman.

“Can we make pancakes for Mama? They’re her favorite.”

“Of course, Squirt.” Lexa smiled, remembering that Clarke was still here in the house. Everything seemed to be normal again. She had spent a Friday afternoon at the fair with her high school friends, and her best friend had stayed the night so they could hang out the next day.

Lexa wondered how many times they had asked to spend the night at Clarke’s house when they were in high school. Mr. and Mrs. Griffin had always insisted that Lexa was welcome, but looking back on it, she was sure having an extra kid almost every weekend was a hassle.

“Do you want to help me make the pancakes?”

Madi squirmed out of Lexa’s arms and slid off the bed, “Yes! Let’s go!”

They made their way into the kitchen and got to work. Lexa put Madi up on the counter so she could help with the process easier.

Clarke appeared in the kitchen right as the last pancakes were ready. The brunette smiled widely at her before ushering her to the table. Madi had set it when Lexa put the second batch of batter on the griddle.

The blonde was still half asleep, but smiled when she saw the blueberries, peanut butter, and honey, as well as cut up strawberries and bananas on the table. Her smile grew when Lexa handed her a piping hot cup of coffee with just the right amount of cream.

Lexa brought a plate of pancakes that had just come off the griddle, and they all sat down to eat.

Lexa watched as Clarke took a bite of the pancakes and nearly moaned at the taste. The noise got stuck in the blonde’s throat, and Lexa blushed.

“These are really good. Thank you so much.”

Lexa beamed at her, “It was Madi’s idea, she helped me make them.”

Clarke smiled, “Thank you, baby.”

Madi mimicked Lexa’s smile and caused Clarke to laugh.

Once they had finished breakfast and cleaned up the kitchen, they each went to their rooms to get dressed.

Lexa was finished first and sat down on the couch in the living room to wait for the two Griffins. Madi came out shortly after, and stood off to the side of the room. When Lexa noticed her standing there, she smiled.

“Hey, Squirt. I love your boots!”

Madi smiled widely and stuck her foot out so Lexa could get a closer look at the brown cowgirl boots.

“Thanks!”

Lexa beckoned her closer and motioned to the television, “Do you want to watch some documentaries while we wait for your Mama?”

Madi nodded and leapt onto the couch. She snuggled into Lexa’s side as she turned on the documentary about crabs.

When Clarke arrived in the room, she found Madi sitting on Lexa’s lap. The brunette’s chin was on her daughter’s shoulder so she could see the television, and her arms were wrapped tightly around her.

Neither of them noticed her since they were so immersed in the documentary, so she took a couple of pictures to memorialize the moment. Besides, the look on Lexa’s face was priceless.

After appreciating the adorableness for a couple of moments, she cleared her throat and walked further into the room.

“Are you both ready?”

Lexa’s head turned slowly from the television to Clarke, her eyes wide and her jaw dropped open ever so slightly. Clarke’s smile grew wider and it was difficult for her to not laugh at the sight.

“Look, Mama! The crabs!” Madi pointed frantically at the screen, desperate for her mother to appreciate the crustaceans.

Clarke laughed, walking over to the side of the couch and reaching out to stroke her daughter’s hair.

“Haven’t we seen this one before?”

“So?” Madi smiled up at her briefly before turning back to the screen. Clarke shook her head with amusement. She would never understand her daughter’s fascination with documentaries.

“Hi.”

Clarke raised an eyebrow and turned to Lexa, who was still staring at her with wide eyes.

“Hi there. You okay?”

Lexa nodded, slowly turning her head back to the television. They watched until the next commercial break before turning it off.

They all piled into Lexa’s car after triple checking to make sure they had everything, and began the hour long drive to the ranch. As soon as they got onto the freeway, Madi pulled a Mad Libs out of her bag.

“Adjective!”

Lexa’s eyebrows pulled together, creating a crease, “Sloppy.”

Clarke feigned hurt when the brunette smiled proudly at her, “I’m not sloppy.”

“I didn’t say you were.”

“You looked at me though.”

“Yes, I did.”

“Another adjective,” Madi interrupted them and Lexa stifled a laugh.

“Snobbish,” Clarke said and raised an eyebrow at Lexa, but she just shrugged.

“Type of bird.”

“Penguin.”

Clarke snorted, “Lex. They can’t even fly. How can they be a type of bird?”

“Not all birds can fly. Penguins are birds.”

“They’re birds, Mama.”

Clarke rolled her eyes, “Fine.”

“Room in a house,” Madi asked after a few minutes of silence.

“Attic,” Clarke responded immediately.

Lexa laughed, which resulted in a smack from Clarke. She pressed her lips together in order to keep from laughing again, and focused on driving while Madi wrote down the answer.

“Okay. Verb, past tense.”

Clarke narrowed her eyes in thought, but Lexa quickly spoke up.

“Poured.”

“Verb.”

“Brush.”

Lexa’s mouth formed an ‘o’ shape and she quickly checked her hair and teeth in the mirror. Clarke had to put her hand over her mouth to stifle the laugh that threatened to escape and pretended to not have been looking.

“Relative’s name.”

“John Murphy.”

“Noun.”

“Army,” Clarke responded after a moment.

“A liquid.”

Lexa opened her mouth a couple of times, but nothing came out. Clarke raised her eyebrows when the brunette looked over, a deer-in-the-headlights look on her face.

“Water.”

Clarke mouthed ‘good save’, and shook her head with amusement.

“Verb ending in -ing.”

“Watching.”

Lexa had a small smile on her lips as she looked over her shoulder to make a lane change.

“Part of the body, plural.”

“Toes,” Lexa supplied, laughing when Clarke smacked her.

“Plural noun,” Madi continued. She was completely unaware of anything that the two adults in the front seats were doing.

“Opinions.”

Madi’s nose scrunched up, just like Clarke’s does when she’s confused, and Lexa almost died from the cuteness when she saw it in the rearview mirror.

“You’re picking weird words.”

“Isn’t that the point, Squirt?”

Madi rolled her eyes, another trait she earned from Clarke, “Verb ending in -ing.”

“Balancing,” Clarke offered.

“Last one is a noun.”

“Garbage.”

Clarke’s nose scrunched, just like Madi’s, but Lexa didn’t see because she was changing lanes again.

“Okay. Are you ready?”

“Shoot.   
  


Madi cleared her throat, “It was a sloppy, cold November day. I woke up to the snobbish smell of penguin roasting in the attic downstairs,” Madi began,

“The poor penguin!” Lexa interrupted, “Oh sorry, keep going.”

Madi sighed, but continued, “I poured down the stairs to see if I could help brush the dinner. My mom said, ‘See if John Murphy needs a fresh army.’”

Clarke laughed out loud before stifling it with her hand.

“I carried a tray of glasses full of water into the watching room. When I got there, I couldn’t believe my toes! There were opinions balancing on the garbage!”

Lexa laughed, “I can’t believe my toes!”

Clarke put her head in her hands and groaned, “How much farther until I can get out of the car?”

“Another!” Lexa smiled at Clarke.

Madi was silent for a moment, and all that could be heard was the sound of little fingers brushing against paper.

“Ooh, found one. Okay, are you ready?”

“Always, Squirt.”

“Plural noun.”

“Newspapers,” Lexa offered, looking down at her phone for a brief moment to check the directions.

“Adjective.”

"Spiffy,” Clarke smiled proudly as Lexa snorted.

“Plural noun, animals.”

“Tortoises.”

“Didn’t you used to have a tortoise?” Clarke asked, her eyes narrowed.

“Yeah, his name was Paul. I gave him to that kid with the glasses at the end of the street when I went to college.”

“Oh yeah! Do you think he’s still there?”

“Probably, they live for so long.”

Madi huffed, “Plural noun.”

Lexa mouthed ‘oops’ at Clarke, who just smiled back at her, “Teachers.”

The brunette rolled her eyes.

“Adjective.”

“Zany.”

Clarke gasped silently and Lexa smiled widely at her.

“Color.”

“Red,” Clarke supplied. She was staring out the window at the trees.

“Adjective.”

“Curly.”

“Noun.”

“Supermarket.”

“What the heck, mom,” Madi mumbled under her breath before saying, “plural noun,” much louder.

“Freezers,” Lexa offered,

Madi groaned, “Adjective.”

“Colossal.”

“Verb.”

“Carry.”

“Plural noun.”

“Professors.”

Lexa narrowed her eyes at Clarke. The blonde shrugged nonchalantly.

“Verb ending in -ed.”

“Scratched.”

“Verb.”

“Shop.”

Last two, a noun and an adjective.”

“Pizza,” Lexa offered, and glanced at Clarke whose eyes were narrowed in thought.

“Mama?”

“Plastic.”

“Okay, you ready?”

Clarke met Lexa’s eyes and smiled softly at the brunette’s raised eyebrows.

“Go for it, Squirt.”

“Unicorns aren’t like other newspapers; they’re spiffy. They look like tortoises, with teachers for feet and a zany mane of hair. But unicorns are green and have a curly supermarket on their heads.”

Lexa and Clarke looked at each other and laughed. The image it was conjuring up was too amazing.

“Some freezers don’t believe unicorns are colossal, but I believe in them. I would love to carry a unicorn to faraway professors. One thing I’ve always scratched about is whether unicorns shop for rainbows or if their pizza is plastic like other animals’?”

“Nice, Squirt.” Lexa said after catching her breath. It had taken a while for her and Clarke to stop laughing.

They put on Disney songs for the rest of the car ride and they all sang at the top of their lungs. Lexa couldn’t remember ever having this much fun on a mini road trip. Periodically, she would glance over at Clarke or into the rearview mirror at Madi and see them dancing ridiculously to whatever song was playing and she would smile widely.

These two Griffins meant the world to her, and she knew then, that she was a goner.


	10. Only Human

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Again, a big thank you to my amazing friend for editing!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW:  
> Descriptions of Domestic Violence/Slight Gore
> 
> Stay safe everyone

When they arrived back at Lexa’s house after going to the ranch, it was dark outside. Lexa had offered to make them food and both of the Griffins agreed that a homemade dinner sounded delicious.

Clarke had excused herself from the kitchen early on in the process to call Raven and Octavia. Madi was seated on the couch with a documentary playing on the TV. Once Lexa had finished making dinner, she asked Madi to help her bring everything to the table.

On the way, Madi accidentally dropped a bowl of salsa on the ground and it spilled on Lexa’s foot. The brunette shivered at the feeling and sent an accusing—but playful—glare at the little girl.

Madi shrieked and attempted to escape but Lexa’s long legs made it easy to catch up to her. She scooped up the little girl into her arms and began to tickle her.

What Lexa didn’t expect was the very real and terrified scream that emerged from Madi. She was so startled that she quickly set Madi down. Clarke, who had run out of her room when she heard Madi screaming, made sure she was standing between her and Lexa.

The anger and fear on Clarke’s face made Lexa stumble backwards.

“Clarke?”

The blonde offered no reply so Lexa tried again.

“Clarke.”

Clarke’s glazed eyes snapped up to the brunette’s face, “We’re leaving.”

Lexa’s eyes burned with tears she refused to shed. The look on Clarke’s face was so far from the warm smiles they had been sharing all day. Her eyes were cold and her expression was hard. She even backed away from Lexa in order to put distance between them..

“Let us leave.”

Lexa sucked in a shallow breath before pointing to the keys that were hanging on a hook beside the door.

“Take my car.”

Clarke picked up Madi, grabbed the keys, and dashed out of the door. She didn’t even bother to collect her belongings from either of the rooms.

When the door slammed shut, Lexa crumbled to the ground. She stayed curled in on herself, wondering what she had done to chase away the most important people in her life. Now that she was alone, she let the tears escape.

_ Whack! _

Lexa shied away from the hand that had struck her. When she peaked through blurry eyes and tear stained cheeks she saw Anya crouched in front of her.

“You weren’t responding.”

Lexa scooted herself back against the wall and wrapped her arms tightly around her stomach.

Raven appeared from the hallway with Clarke’s phone.

“All their stuff is here.”

A sob wracked through Lexa’s body and Anya jerked backwards in surprise. She had never seen Lexa cry like this.

“What in the  _ fuck _ did you do?”

Lincoln smacked at her before he crouched down in front of Lexa.

“Hey, what happened?”

The brunette let out a shaky breath. She pointed to the bowl that was laying on the ground and the puddle of salsa. Lexa opened her mouth to speak but all that came out was a gasp as her body convulsed again.

Octavia came up beside Lincoln and crouched down next to him.

“What happened, Lexa?”

Nothing about her tone was friendly, but she was calm. Lexa couldn’t blame her for the venom in her voice. She had already been on thin ice after showing up six years later. Now she had physically  _ done _ something to make Clarke hate her.

“We were making dinner,” Lexa paused so she could hiccup and wipe her cheeks, “Madi accidentally dropped salsa on my foot,” another hiccup, “so I grabbed her and tickled her—”

“You did not.”

Lexa looked up at Octavia helplessly. Raven groaned behind them before dismissing herself to clean up Clarke and Madi’s things so she wouldn’t have to witness Lexa’s doom.

“What am I supposed to do now?” Lexa’s voice was barely above a whisper, and it was desperate.

Octavia shook her head and stood up, “Give her some space for a couple of days. Oh, and be gentle.”

*

It had been almost three months since the horse ranch. Lexa hadn’t heard from Clarke since then, but Charlotte had made sure to update her on Madi’s wellbeing whenever she happened to babysit.

Lexa was happy that Madi seemed to be doing much better, but it hurt that she couldn’t see her.

She had taken Octavia’s advice and waited a couple of days before reaching out. When she did, however, she received no response.

Anya reassured her—over the phone since she and Lincoln had to return to France—that Clarke was just taking time to work through it.

When she marked the three month anniversary off the calendar she nearly broke. She missed seeing Clarke, Madi, and the rest of their high school friends. She saw Bellamy occasionally when he came over with John or at the bar, but that was it.

Every school night, she would stay out later and later at the bar, and Bellamy consistently cut her off. Bellamy tried to offer an ear to listen to her troubles, but she didn’t want to talk about it. She had lost her best friend for the second time.

One night as she was about to drive away from the bar, her phone rang. She picked it up without checking the name.

“Hello?”

_ “Hey, Lex.” _

Lexa stared blankly out of her windshield.

“Costia?”

_“Yeah. I just got back from my backpacking trip. Titus said you’ve been slacking on your work.”_

Lexa sighed and leaned back into the seat, “Of course he did. I’m fine. How was your trip?”

_“My trip was great, but I’m not done talking about you. You had to wait six years, Lex. I don’t want you to drink yourself deep when your future is just around the corner. Go home.”_

“I don’t know if I can.”

_“Lex, you told me four years ago that you had your eye on her. If she’s still single just go for it.”_

“She’s pissed at me, Cos.”

_“Yeah, well so is everyone else. Apologize, make up, make out.”_

“I’m not doing the last one.”

_ “Your loss. Now go get your girl, and call me once you get to the other side.”_

After Costia hung up, memories flooded back to Lexa.

*  _ Four Years Ago  _ *

Lexa opened the door for Costia and they walked into the restaurant.

“Hello. Do you two ladies have a reservation?”

“Yes. For Murphy?”

The older man smiled widely as he picked up two menus, “Alexandria! Of course. I should have known it was you.”

Lexa smiled politely back at the man as they turned to go to their table. Once they were seated and handed the menus, a waiter brought them a glass of wine and two glasses.

Lexa poured a glass for each of them and they looked over the menu.

“Lexa.”

The brunette looked up, her eyebrows raised as she waited for Costia to continue.

“Look, I think you’re really great and you’re absolutely stunning, but I’m not really looking for a relationship right now.”

Lexa’s eyes widened and she was glad she hadn’t been drinking her wine or she would have spit it out.

“I didn’t even think about it being a date. I’m so sorry! I’m not looking for a relationship either, I just thought it would be nice to go out and have dinner. I don’t have many friends here.”

Costia smiled widely, “I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

Lexa smiled back but they were interrupted by the waiter arriving. The man took their order before scurrying off again. Once they were alone, Costia leaned forward.

“So why  _ aren’t _ you looking for a relationship?”

Lexa chuckled and set her glass down, “I’m interested in someone from back home. It wouldn’t be right to try to make a relationship work when I wouldn’t be in it completely.”

Costia nodded, “I get that.”

It was Lexa’s turn to lean forward, “What about you?”

“I’ve been talking to a girl online for a while now. I don’t know where it’s going, but I want to find out.”

Lexa smiled sadly, “That’s awesome. Is she close?”

“She actually lives in your hometown but she travels a lot.”

Lexa nodded and leaned back. Costia’s head tilted to the side.

“You seem sad.”

Lexa chuckled, “Not sad, jealous I guess. No one from my hometown has responded to my messages.”

Costia nodded in understanding, “I could ask her if she knows them? She went to a local college so I’m sure she knows someone.”

“Are you sure she wouldn’t be jealous you’re out to dinner with someone else?”

Costia rolled her eyes, “You’re unbearable.”

Lexa smiled widely, breaking eye contact when the food arrived.

The rest of the dinner went by smoothly and they talked more about their lives before and after getting hired at the company. They talked about Indra and the other staff as well as mundane things such as their favorite colors and whether they were a cat person or a dog person.

Overall, they both thoroughly enjoyed the night and felt as though they had just made a new best friend. They made plans for the following weekend to go hiking and exchanged numbers.

*  _ Present Day  _ *

That’s how a very drunk Lexa found herself at Mr. and Mrs. Griffin’s house, searching for a certain blonde. Jake welcomed her in and tucked her into the guest bed after consoling her tears.

When she woke up in the morning, there was a glass of water and a bottle of ibuprofen on the night table. She gratefully downed two of the pills and swiftly finished off the glass of water.

She stumbled out of the room with squinted eyes and a throbbing headache. Jake was at the counter with a pot of coffee and smiled sympathetically when she arrived. She noticed that the curtains had been drawn and no lights were on.

“Thank you.” Her voice was raspy from the drinks and the crying, but Mr. Griffin said nothing. He just smiled, handed her a mug of coffee, and watched in fascination as she chugged it straight down without any sugar or cream.

After her second cup of coffee and her fourth glass of water, Abby walked into the kitchen. She stopped right beside the stool Lexa was sitting on and smiled at her.

“Hey, kiddo.” Her voice was soothing and Lexa leaned into her. She sighed with relief when the older woman’s arms circled around her.

“I’m sorry for being a complete ass the other day.”

Abby’s chest vibrated with silent laughter and stroked the brunette’s hair gently, “All is forgiven.”

“I screwed up. Royally.”

“With Clarke, yes, but I was the one who was way out of line the other night. Let’s call it even between us two, and we can focus on getting things between you and Clarke back to normal.”

Jake handed his wife a cup of coffee before sitting on a barstool next to Lexa.

“Look, kiddo, a lot of things have happened in the past six years. We’ve arranged for Clarke to come by later. I’ll take Madi to the park and hopefully you two will be able to work things out.”

Lexa’s eyes widened and she looked down at herself. Her button down was wrinkly and smelled like beer. She was sure her hair and makeup were a mess, but she hadn’t looked in the mirror.

Jake chuckled at the helpless look she gave him once she finished her self assessment.

“There are some clothes in the dresser, and please take a shower.”

Abby lovingly rolled her eyes at her husband before kissing both of their foreheads, “Behave yourselves. I’m going to work.”

*

Lexa wished she could have looked more formal for this conversation, but sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt would have to do. The plan had worked out quite well.

Jake and Madi had already departed for the park and Clarke was inside of the house. She hadn’t moved from where she had been standing when she saw Lexa.

“Look, I’m probably the last person you want to talk to right now, but—”

“You’re right.” Clarke straightened her back and lifted her chin, but the bags under her eyes revealed just how much the last three months had affected her.

Lexa sighed and took a step forward, “I think I know what I did, and I would appreciate it if we could talk.”

Clarke kept her eyes trained on Lexa but made no move to respond.

“Who hurt her?”

The blonde’s shoulders slumped at Lexa’s question. She was still in a defensive position but she seemed more broken than angry now.

Lexa clenched her fists. She was furious. Someone had hurt Madi, and there was nothing she could do to protect her. While she was flaunting around Paris, her best friend’s daughter was being hurt.

“Look, Lex. I dated a lot of people during those six years after you left. Some of them weren’t that great and the last guy was so bad that I swore off dating and bringing new people into Madi’s life in general.

“We had everyone we needed and no one we didn’t need. Then you came back. Thinking I could trust you alone with her and then hearing her scream—”

Clarke wiped her cheeks to dry them of the tears and shook her head.

“He did things to me that should have been reason enough to break it off immediately, but I just needed a body to warm my bed. When he touched Madi though, that was the last straw. No one is allowed to hurt my baby.”

Lexa watched her carefully before taking a small step forward, “Who was he?”

“A nobody. He’s in jail now.”

The brunette nodded, “I’m sorry I scared her. I didn’t—no, I’m not going to make excuses. I did something stupid and now I’ve paid the consequences for them,” Lexa sighed and dropped her gaze to the floor, “I wish I could have been here for you.”

Clarke smiled weakly before closing the distance between them, “There’s nothing we can do to change the past.”

Lexa nodded, “I need to apologize to Madi.”

“Later.”

Lexa’s gaze finally returned to Clarke’s face and her eyebrows drew together, “How bad was it?”

“He yelled at me every day when I got back after school and work. I was exhausted, but he would force me to,  _ you know _ . Madi stayed here with my parents for most of that relationship so he didn’t interact with her a ton. I’m thankful for that.

“One day I brought her back after shopping and he was drunk. I knew it was a recipe for disaster, but I was just so exhausted. As soon as he saw Madi though, he got so mad. Just like all the others, seeing her was a reminder that there was someone before them.

“He smashed a bottle and lunged at us. I—”

Clarke took a deep breath before turning around and pulling her shirt halfway off. There were several long scars across her lower back and a cluster of small ones on her shoulder.

Lexa reached out hesitantly and traced each of them. She tried to keep herself focused on the feeling of Clarke’s warm skin under her fingertips to distract herself from the realization that Clarke and Madi could have been killed.

Clarke pulled her shirt back down and turned around to face Lexa. The horror in her eyes caused Clarke to reach out and grab her hand. Their fingers intertwined easily and the blonde just continued to explain.

“I passed out and when I woke up Madi was bruised all over her body and her arm was broken. They said it was lucky that the glass had gotten stuck in my leg or she would have been cut up worse than me.

“The next time I woke up I was in the hospital with god-knows how many stitches and a 3 year old daughter in a cast.

Lexa gently turned Clarke’s hand so that both of their palms were facing the ceiling. She stroked the side of the blonde’s hand slowly as the gears turned in her head.

“You said there were others. How many of them hurt you?”

“Most of them. I thought I didn’t deserve anyone who would treat me well.”

Fire burned in Lexa’s gaze, “That’s my fault.”

Clarke sighed, “It was because of you, yes, but you didn’t know that would happen so you can’t blame yourself.”

Lexa nodded, silently agreeing not to blame herself. It made sense logically, but she still felt horrible.

“Did her father hurt you?”

“No, he was extremely kind. He helped a lot throughout the pregnancy and after she was born. He did his best to provide for us and I thank him every day for that.”

“Why didn’t you stay with him?”

\

“We were drunk out of our minds at a party and neither of us knew what had happened until I got a positive pregnancy test and a DNA test a while later,” Clarke paused, a fond smile finding its way onto her face, “Plus, he has a boyfriend now.”


	11. A Hell of a View

_ Previously… _

_“Did her father hurt you?”_

_“No. He was extremely kind. He helped me a lot throughout the pregnancy and after she was born. He did his best to provide for us and I thank him everyday for that.”_

_“Why didn’t it work between you?”_

_ “We were drunk out of our minds at a party and neither of us knew it had even happened until I got a DNA test a couple of months later,” Clarke paused, a fond smile finding its way onto her face, “Plus he has a boyfriend now.”_

*

Lexa narrowed her eyes, “You kept in touch with him for six years?”

“It’s kind of hard not to when he’s your best friend’s brother and the boyfriend of your other friend’s brother.”

Lexa stood up and began storming out of the front door, “I’m going to kill him!”

Clarke’s eyebrows shot up and she ran after Lexa. When she caught up to her, they were halfway down the driveway in the rain. When it had started raining, neither one knew. The day had promised warm weather and sunshine.

“Lex, look at me, please.”

Lexa stopped and faced the blonde but refused to meet her eyes.

“We were drunk. It meant nothing and it still means nothing. Neither of us is the least bit interested in the other and he was so, so good to me. I don’t know if I could have made it through the pregnancy without him, let allow the birth and her toddler years.

“He was such a wonderful father for Madi back then, and someday he’s going to be a wonderful father for his own children.”

Lexa’s eyes finally rose to meet Clarke’s. The fire that burned earlier had long since died out and her hair was sopping wet. Despite the sheet of falling rain, Clarke could clearly see the gears turning in Lexa’s head.

“What are you thinking about?”

“It makes so much sense now.”

Clarke tilted her head to the side.

“At the ranch she kept doing little things that reminded me of myself when I rode horses. I thought it was just a weird little coincidence but it makes so much more sense now.”

Clarke smiled softly as the realization hit her, “Yeah, she’s a lot like you, isn’t she?”

Lexa nodded distractedly before her eyes suddenly lit up and she grabbed Clarke’s arm with excitement.

“Come to Paris with me.”

“Excuse me?”

Lexa laughed to herself under her breath and let go of Clarke’s arm, “I have to go back during Thanksgiving Break anyways, and I want you and Madi to come with me. I said I’d never leave but since I have to, I’m bringing you with me. That’s fine, right?”

“I guess?”

“Great!” Lexa hugged her tightly before spinning her around and ushering her back into the house. It was still raining and they were both soaked to the bone.

Merely seconds after they arrived in the house, they heard the garage open and Mrs. Griffin stormed in.

“You two! Get in the garage!” She shooed them outside before grabbing towels for them.

“Hey, kiddos.”

Lexa and Clarke turned to see Jake and Madi standing there, both of them soaked as well.

“Didn’t see that one coming.”

Clarke laughed and wrapped Madi up in her towel, “Here, baby, let's get you warmed up.”

Lexa didn’t know her place yet with Madi, but got close enough to wrap her own towel around Clarke. The blonde smiled at her gratefully before drying herself and her daughter off and taking her inside.

Jake and Lexa stared at each other for a couple moments before breaking out into huge grins.

“I get to keep you!” Jake threw his arms around the brunette and hugged her tightly.

Lexa laughed, reveling in the feeling of being hugged by the closest thing to a father she’d ever had. She gripped his shirt for dear life, and didn’t even realize she was crying until Jake pulled away and wiped her cheeks.

“Hey, kiddo. What’s going on?”

Lexa let out a watery giggle, “They’re coming to Paris with me. I get to take them to Paris.”

“Oh no. You’ve got it bad, kiddo.”

Lexa suddenly grew solemn as Abby arrived once more with two more towels. She looked between them and wrung her hands together. Once the towel was wrapped around her shoulders she sighed deeply.

“Hey, can I talk to you two for a minute?”

*

Once they were all dried off and changed into comfy clothes, Abby began to set up a movie and make hot cocoa with marshmallows. Lexa quickly realized that Madi and Clarke were nowhere to be found.

She chanced a look at Jake who motioned with his head towards the stairs. Lexa nodded and made her way up. The closer she got to the top, the more she could hear Clarke and Madi talking.

She found the room where their voices were coming from and knocked. She decided eavesdropping was a bad idea. It was silent for a moment before Clarke pulled the door open and smiled at her.

Lexa walked into the room and saw Madi watching her from the corner. She was wary but she didn’t seem as frightened as the other night.

“Hey, Squirt.”

Lexa crouched down and held out her hand. There was a tiny plastic crab in her palm. Madi reached out and traced the crab with her finger while her eyes were wide with curiosity.

“I’m so sorry that I frightened you.”

Madi remained silent and kept her gaze focused on the crab. Her little hand had settled down on top of it and her fingertips brushed Lexa’s palm.

“I want you to know that I love you so very much. If I ever do something to make you doubt that, tell me, because the day I stop loving you will be the day that I leave this earth.”

Madi’s eyes slowly locked with Lexa’s and they stared at each other silently for a couple of moments.

“I’m sorry, Leksa.”

“For what?”

“Spilling on you.”

“Oh, no, baby. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Madi nodded before stepping into Lexa’s space and wrapping her little arms around her neck.

“I love you, Leksa.”

“I love you too, don’t ever forget that.”

*

The trio returned downstairs and they all sat down with their hot cocoa to watch the movie.

Jake and Abby shared the loveseat while Madi sat between Clarke and Lexa on the couch.

About halfway through the movie, everyone except for Clarke and Lexa had fallen asleep. They turned the volume on the movie down before Lexa carried Madi upstairs and Clarke tucked her into the bed.

Once they were sure she was asleep, they made their way into the kitchen and began cleaning up the hot cocoa mugs and spoons. They had settled into an easy silence before Lexa turned off the faucet and sighed.

“I’m the CEO.”

Clarke stopped loading the dishwasher and raised her eyebrow, “What?”   
  


“Of the company. It was my dad’s company and he gave it to me to run.”

“Isn’t your dad, you know…”

Lexa nodded, “Yeah. He left it in Indra’s hands to give to me when I graduated.”

“Wait a second,  _ that _ company?”

Lexa smiled sheepishly as a deep blush covered her cheeks.

“Oh my god. You’re like a trillionaire.”

Lexa shook her head rapidly, “Not quite.”

Clarke laughed, “So when you said you were going to buy Madi a pony you weren’t joking even a little bit?”

Lexa blushed again and Clarke laughed louder.

“She has you under the tip of her finger.”

A grin took over Lexa’s features and her eyes were lit up with excitement, “Okay, but did you see how happy she was when she was riding the horse though?”

“That doesn’t mean that she needs one of her own.”

Lexa pouted at Clarke.

“Don’t try to buy her affections, Lex.”

“I guess I’ll just have to settle for taking you both to Paris.”

Clarke smiled softly, but Lexa could tell how giddy she was. She knew that the blonde had never been outside of the U.S., to go to Europe was extremely exciting.

“Madi will be ecstatic.”

“I’m already ecstatic.”

Clarke rolled her eyes affectionately, “Finish washing the dishes.”

Lexa pouted again, but did as she was told.

*

Madi was in fact, ecstatic, and began packing as soon as a trip to Paris was mentioned. It was only a week later that the trio set out early in the morning to the airport and began their flight to Paris.

Madi begged for the window seat, which Lexa easily allowed her to take, and Clarke opted for the middle seat so she could be next to both of them.

Madi fell asleep the moment they took off, and Clarke followed quickly behind. Lexa opted to read for the entire flight, but was extremely distracted by the blonde curls that tickled her face due to the head on her shoulder.

Eleven hours later, they landed in Paris. Anya and Lincoln picked them up from the airport and brought them back to Indra’s house.

“How was the flight?” Anya asked, watching the reactions of her passengers in the rearview mirror.

Madi waved halfheartedly while Clarke just smiled warmly. Both of the Griffin girls were still mostly asleep, leaving Lexa to answer.

“Long.”

Lincoln laughed, “Yeah, it’s a doozy.”

They continued to make small talk throughout the drive and when they pulled into the garage, Indra hurried out to meet them.

“Alexandria!”

Lexa hugged the woman tightly before pulling back and motioning to the two Griffins, “This is Clarke and her daughter Madi.”

“Oh my! I’ve heard so many things about you two, it is a pleasure to finally meet you both.”

Clarke eagerly shook the woman’s hand, “Thank you so much for letting us stay here.”

“Of course. Any of Alexandria’s family is welcome in my home.”

Indra’s choice of words didn’t go over the blonde’s head, but she didn’t have time to wonder much about it because Madi had marched up to the woman.

“Hello!”

Indra crouched down with a huge smile on her face, “Hi, there!”

Madi gave a curt nod before running up to Lexa and being lifted into the air.

Lexa, Clarke, and Madi spent the rest of the day getting settled in the house until Gustus returned from work and they had dinner all together. The seven of them retired to the couches and watched movies together until it was time for bed.


	12. There Ain't No Better View

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, once again, to my amazing friend for editing!

When they woke up, Indra was in the kitchen with a huge breakfast prepared and all seven of them ate together once again. Once they had finished the meal, they got ready to go to the park.

Madi and Gustus got along splendidly and they walked together with Indra in front of Clarke and Lexa on the way down the sidewalk.

“They seem like great people.”

Lexa turned her head to the side to see Clarke and smiled softly, “Yeah. Indra and Gustus are the only reason I didn’t end up nose deep in assignments and whiskey bottles.”

Clarke’s eyes widened in surprise, “What do you mean?”

The brunette chuckled and waved it off, “I missed my home so it was hard to focus on school and my roommate had an endless supply of liquor.”

“You chose to leave.”

Lexa sighed, she could see the hurt in the blue eyes that stared back at her. She  _ had _ chosen to leave, but she also knew that Clarke wouldn’t have let her choose to stay. She had always dreamed of going to school in Paris.

*  _ Six Years Ago _ *

“Why is your suitcase packed?” Murphy called as Lexa hurried out of her room and almost ran into him.

“I got accepted into the college in Paris.”

Murphy entered the room and looked at the open laptop next to the suitcase. His eyebrows drew together which caused a crease to appear in his forehead.

“You’re leaving tonight?”

If she heard the disappointment in his voice, she didn’t show it as she stuffed her shoes into her suitcase and began zipping it up. Murphy’s hand on her arm caused her to pause. 

“You’re leaving.”

She straightened her posture and jutted out her chin, “Yes, John. They want me there in the morning so I have to fly on a redeye.”

He wandered about her room slowly before stopping in front of their parents’ wedding picture that was hanging on the wall, “Do you think they would approve?”

“Of me going to Paris? They lived there, John.”

“Not you. Not Paris. Me,” he turned and looked at her, fear written all over his face as he whispered, “Do you think they would approve of me?”

Arms surrounded him tightly and he breathed in the familiar scent of his sister.

“John, they would love you. You know they would.”

Murphy shook his head, sucking in another breath, “But—”

“No ‘but’s.” She pulled away from him with a smile on her face. After a moment she pranced around the room and collected the final things she would need for her flight.

“The driver will be here any minute,” she started, before looking up at Murphy, “Tell them all goodbye for me?”

He nodded slowly, watching the way her eyes darted anxiously around the room and her the way her body seemed to shake. He was about to hug her on last time, but she grabbed her suitcase and dashed out the door before he had a chance.

*

For the next three days, Murphy sat on his couch. He only got up to eat when Bellamy—who could only come on weekends—or Emori came by the house and forced him to.

He barely functioned for the first year, but once he graduated high school and began college he started to recover from the abandonment of his last known living relative. He had made peace with the fact that she wasn’t coming back.

He had thought about inviting her out for his graduation, but Bellamy gently reminded him that he would be setting himself up for disappointment. Every other time he had asked her to come back and visit during that first year, she had made some excuse, causing him to spiral back into his depression.

He thought once about telling Lexa about Madi, but realized that telling her he got her high school crush pregnant was not a good way to make conversation. The fact that he had to hide that from her made it harder to talk to her about anything.

His life and the lives of everyone around him revolved around the baby and anything they did involved her.

When he was applying for colleges, Bellamy suggested that he apply to colleges on the East Coast so that they could be together. Murphy did exactly that and even got accepted to the same college that Bellamy was going to.

Bellamy was a junior the year that Murphy and Miller attended as freshmen. Murphy was able to get a dorm room with Miller, but would stay at Bellamy’s off-campus apartment every weekend.

Being on the opposite side of the country seemed to help him a lot and Bellamy was thrilled. He would make Murphy pancakes or waffles every Saturday before taking him to see a monument or historical building somewhere on the coast. They would spend the whole weekend exploring the city and all it had to offer.

On three day weekends, they would go out into the country and drive until they found somewhere fun to camp. They would watch the stars and talk about how the school week had been. Sometimes they would even tell spooky stories around the campfire, hike, attempt to roast marshmallows, and swim in whatever body of water was nearby.

Murphy barely even thought about the brunette in Paris at all for his entire four years of college, until he got a letter from her one night in the middle of his senior year.

Bellamy was in the kitchen making dinner while Murphy was sorting the mail at their table. He saw a letter from Paris and almost instinctively moved to throw it away, thinking it was spam.

The return address caused him to pause. It was the address of his mother’s house, but there was no name attached. He ripped it open and began reading.

_ Mr. John Murphy: _

_ I am quite positive you do not wish to hear from me; your lack of response to my attempts to reach out have made that extremely clear. However, I wished to formally congratulate you on your graduation from high school and your attendance at the college in Massachusetts. The professors there have been impressed with your performance and growth from your first year there until now. _

_ I have put the deed of the house in your name because it is unlikely that I will be able to return. If you wish to sell it, that is your decision to make. If you wish to keep it, please note that the mortgage has been fully paid off and money will be sent to your account every month to pay for both the electrical and water bills. I trust that you can find a part time job in order to pay for your groceries. _

_ I’m extremely proud of you and everything you have done. May we meet again. _

_ Signed, _

_ Ms. Alexandria Murphy _

_ CEO of Trikru _

*  _ Present Day _ *

When they arrived at the park, Clarke and Lexa chose to take a seat on the bench while Indra and Gustus followed Madi around like lost puppies. The blonde found it endearing how taken the older couple was with her daughter.

Lexa had seemed lost in thought since they sat down, so Clarke hadn’t really made an effort to converse. She was content watching the joy on Madi’s face as she ran around at the park.

Suddenly, an extremely attractive woman stopped in front of their bench with a wide smile on her face. Clarke instinctively reached out and grabbed Lexa’s arm. It got the brunette’s attention and after glancing at Clarke, Lexa looked up at the woman in front of them.

“Cos?”

The woman nodded and Lexa stood up—pulling Clarke with her accidentally. She hugged the other woman tightly and they were both smiling when they pulled away.

Lexa seemed to remember Clarke beside her and slipped her arm around her waist, “Costia, this is Clarke.”

If it was even possible, the woman—Costia’s smile grew.

“It’s so nice to finally put a face to Lexie’s mindless ramblings.”

Lexa blushed a deep red before clearing her throat, “Costia was hired at the company a couple years after me and worked closely with Indra.”

“It’s nice to meet you too.”

“I would’ve been hired first if Alexandria hadn't had personal connections,” Costia quipped, her eyes shining with mirth.

Lexa rolled her eyes and Clarke smiled comfortably.

“Anyways, I’ve really got to be going. I’m supposed to be at work right now but I saw you and I just  _ had _ to say hello.”

Lexa nodded in understanding, “I’ll see you at the office later?”

“Yep!”

The two women shared another hug before Costia waved to Clarke and scurried off.

Lexa’s arm tightened around Clarke’s waist briefly before she let go and sat back down on the bench. The blonde sat down as well, leaving a bit of distance between them.

“She seems nice,” Clarke stated, watching Lexa carefully.

“Yeah, she’s great.”

Clarke’s eyes narrowed but Lexa stayed focused on Indra, Gustus and Madi on the playground.

“She’s gorgeous, too.”

Lexa turned then to look at Clarke with one eyebrow raised, “What are you getting at?”

Clarke shrugged nonchalantly, “Just stating observations.”

“Are you hitting on my aunt’s secretary?”

“Is that all she is to you?”

Lexa’s face morphed into more confusion, “What is that supposed to mean?”

“I think you two are a cute couple and I want you to know that even though I missed six years, you can tell me who you’re dating.”

The brunette laughed out loud before realizing Clarke was serious, “Oh my god. I haven’t dated anyone, least of all her. She’s been dating Luna since we met.”

Clarke’s jaw dropped open, “Wait, really?”

Lexa nodded, still slightly chuckling, “Were you jealous?”

Clarke’s eyes grew wide in a panic and the bright red of her cheeks made the answer obvious.

Lexa’s green eyes dropped to look at Clarke’s lips and she could feel the blonde’s hot breath as she leaned closer. They met each other’s eyes, checking to make sure the other was all in before—

“Mama!”

They pulled away from each other like they had been burned and turned to where Madi’s voice came from. The little girl was sprinting towards them with Indra and Gustus trailing behind her.

*

The rest of the day was filled with fun family activities and apologetic glances. Because they hadn’t had time to talk about what had happened, neither knew if the other had been caught up in the moment or if they had both meant to lean in.

On the drive home, Madi had crashed so Lexa offered to carry her to her bed. Clarke followed close behind and they tucked the little girl in.

Once they were sure she would sleep the night through, Lexa pulled the blonde into her bedroom and onto the balcony. She closed the door behind them and turned to look at Clarke. Clarke stared out at the city, avoiding eye contact.

“I’m sorry.”

Lexa’s eyes narrowed, “Are you apologizing because you didn’t mean to lean in or because you don’t think I meant to?”

“Did you?”

“I did. Did you?”

Clarke sighed, “I don’t know.”

“That’s okay. I’m here when you’re ready.”

Clarke nodded slowly and continued to just enjoy the scenery. They both relished the quiet of the night and the beauty that Paris had to offer.

“When I first came to Paris it was so dull and boring.”

“So you brought me here? Gee, thanks.”

Lexa rolled her eyes, turning to look at Clarke, “It’s the city of love but it was so boring for a person with no eye for art who was separated from the one they love.”

Clarke met Lexa’s gaze and connected the dots, “Oh my god.”

Lexa stuffed her hands in her pockets and looked out at the view, “I know it has been a long six years and we’re still trying to get used to each other again but—”

As soon as Clarke had processed her own thoughts and started hearing what Lexa was saying, she surged forward to kiss her, trying for the love of God to shut her up.

“Wha—”

“The  _ ones _ you love, Lex. I have a kid now.” Clarke reminded her, tracing her jawline with the tip of her finger.

“The loves of my life.” Lexa agreed once she had recovered and pulled Clarke into another kiss. The first kiss had been a quick, hard press of lips against lips but this one was slow and gentle.

Clarke released a gasp against Lexa’s lips as the brunette pulled her closer by her hips. Her fingers reached up to tangle in the baby hairs at the nape of Lexa’s neck.

When they pulled away, they were both breathing heavier. Clarke smiled softly up at Lexa, her hands slipping away from her neck to her shoulders.

“What now?”

Lexa shrugged with a giddy smile on her face, “I didn’t think I’d get this far, but I suppose I need to ask Madi’s permission to date you.”

Clarke laughed. She realized then that she had loved the feeling of Lexa’s arms around her and the way their lips pressed together so much that she had forgotten to use her head. Lexa felt so right to her that she had begun relying on her heart again.

“Yeah, you will.”


	13. NOT A CHAPTER

Hi everyone! The power went out and my computer died so I was unable to finish editing the next chapter. I will be working on it as soon as the power comes back and I can charge my computer. Thank you for your patience, it will be up as soon as possible (hopefully by tonight)!

Edit: The power will not return until Monday. I'm so sorry and I'll try to figure out some way to get the chapter up earlier but it most likely wont be up until Monday or Tuesday. Again, I apologize!

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think! 
> 
> I will be posting Wednesday and Sunday every week from now on until the last chapter.


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